OWN: The Antidote to 24/7 Cable News

To any of the myriad of news organizations out there that have been predicting the demise  of the OWN network,  the reports have been greatly exaggerated. One need only to have been in the audience, as I was yesterday afternoon at Radio City Music Hall to know that. Some six thousand people, mostly women, filled the seats of what is perhaps the greatest venue anywhere. The people I talked to came on buses, trains, planes and cars. They were friendly and happy and grateful that their name had been picked out of all the requests to attend. They have not written off Oprah and her network. They are just reigniting their love affair. And they were patient as they waited on line to be ushered to their seats.

Not like those who  have Google Alerts set for Oprah + OWN + failure and await the next update. Or those of our media who insist upon writing and reporting on the news from a place of scarcity and fear.  Ingrained to look for the worst, find the chinks in the armor, get out of the present and predict doom and gloom because that is what they are directed to do from their corner offices.  They are convinced that is what makes headlines and that is what creates ratings which creates higher ad rates and more advertisers and of course, more money.

None of that ilk is willing to be brave and step forward and take a chance that just maybe that is not true. Just maybe the world is clamoring for something new and refreshing. Something without backstabbing, lies and angry words. Something that will inspire them to live their best lives. Except Oprah.

At a time in her life, where money is not of consequence. When she could as she said, sit under her tree with her dogs and read books, she sees a greater purpose to her success. She wants to use her voice and her platform as a source of inspiration.

Oprah is not a quitter. Oprah is willing to get on CBS This Morning and talk about how much more difficult this is than what she expected. She displays humility and realness and the press twists that  to create an unflattering soundbite. Again, because they are convinced the only reality we want is scripted “reality” television.

I believe they are the ones wrong and Oprah is the one who is right. I am not sure she could have picked a more perfect time than this time, as the world undergoes such a dramatic energetic shift to launch a network with an entirely new and untried format. 

Real change is never easy.  Those who don't like it wait for it to fail, in fact even hope that it does. Because that in some twisted way allows them to stand still, justify their own lives and not risk what they have for what might be.  

I'm an idealist and an optimist. I believe more want hope. They want guidance. They want inspiration. They want to let go of their fears. And Oprah is offering them that 24/7, seven days a week. The antidote if you will to 24/7 cable news.

I'm still reverberating in the energy of yesterday's experience. To be in that room, to see Oprah's brilliance on stage aside the wisdom and gentle humor of Deepak Chopra (who for the record I am more in love with than ever) reminded me of why I am doing what I am doing. To live my life with purpose, to inspire others and to paraphrase Deepak, help to transform the world through my personal transformation.

The show airs April 23. Set your DVR.

And Oprah, if I should be so lucky that you read this blog, in answer to the question we were asked in advance of the taping, what is the one thing that would most change your life at this moment, mine would be you reading my novel, The Secrets They Kept and adding it to your Book List!

Put A Big Red Ribbon Around The Year...Or Not

I’ve always been one who likes to put things in boxes. Seal them up with a ribbon and put them on a shelf. From projects to relationships that have run their course.  My friend Moon refers to it as cleaning things up. Others call it closure or ending cycle. So as the last days of 2011 are upon us that is what I am drawn to do with this year. Put it in a box, tie a big red ribbon around it and because I am that organized, label it. 2011: Evolving.

That was the word I chose back in January. It was what I wanted this year to be about. Evolving. And that has held true. I evolved from writer to published author. I learned how to take a manuscript to book form, both electronically and in print. In that process I rediscovered the parts of my corporate career I still enjoyed, like selling and marketing. I could still experience the thrill of looking for markets that might buy what I have to peddle and the rush when the right ones are linked.  I evolved enough to be able to go back and take a look inside the box I had been refusing to, the one labeled corporate life and see what was inside I still could use. I discovered there were still aspects of that I had not lost my passion for and I was good at. 

I realized that in addition to being a writer and a business coach, I am a connector of people, and a wealth of information. I am an agent of change who loves to share what she knows and help others to create their own change. I evolved to a new version of myself, hopefully combining the best of what was with what has changed.

Some of you may have known all this  already. Some of you may have been on to my shift for a while.  But part of my evolution in 2011, was me owning it. 

So the question, with just a few days left of the year of evolving becomes, do I pack it all away in a box, tie another ribbon  and shelve this year as I have done so many times before ? 


I think not.

I think it is time to evolve my thought process on that as well. Instead I will sort through the events and the lessons, the ups and the downs, the successes and the blips of 2011 and decide what needs to be  put in the shredder, what needs to be saved and what I take with me moving forward.   

Among the many lessons I have learned this year is that while we can bring closure and “clean things up” on  chapters of our lives, those boxes that house those scenes can never be completely sealed shut. They hold lessons that  we need to remember and parts of us that we will build upon moving forward. Even information we can use again on another day in another year. Or people we might at some point want to or need to invite back in. 

Perhaps the thing is not to put a ribbon on the year and store it away but to organize the box that is 2011. 
Ask ourselves questions.
What did you learn? 
What will you take moving forward? 
What parts are you letting go of freely and completely? 
Did the year live up to your word? 
And what will your new word be for 2012?

I have a preference for verbs here. Mostly because they imply action. And as a change catalyst I know words are not enough without steps. My word for 2012 is being seen, which technically is two words. But perhaps that is what I have evolved to. Perhaps one word is just not enough anymore.


Happy New Year!

What is your word for 2012?     Is one enough?

Using My Strength

I've been a gym rat for a long time. I don't pretend to enjoy it. I really do. When I am lax I miss it. Only other gym rats understand. It's an addiction of sorts, but of the best kind.

I worked out with a trainer for a long time. Pre-recession, back in the heyday of my corporate stay when disposable income was aplenty. I like to think I learned the "proper" way to workout and that I am strong.

So when one of the trainers in my gym made mention to me that he liked the way I trained I felt pretty good. And when he offered a free session to train with him, who was I to say no?

Being the life long student that I am I know that no matter how well versed we think we are there is always something new to learn. And when he said there was one or two things he could show me to improve upon what I was doing, I had no doubt there was.

What I wasn't expecting was the great big metaphor on my life he would deliver.

"You are very strong. You're just not using your strength as well as you can." 

So that was cause for pause. Because you see  (1) he was right and (2) this was not just about my workout routine.

As I was trying to concentrate on what he wanted me to do, my mind was racing with how easy it is to repeat out of routine. Do the exercises without really doing them. Getting just enough results that we know we are doing well but not stretching to our full potential. What Gay Hendricks calls living in the zone of excellence but stopping ourselves from leaning into our zone of genius in his book The Big Leap.

"Are you OK?"

I think it was the look on my face that made him ask. I nodded yes, and mumbled that he had me thinking about more than squeezing my gluts tighter while swinging the kettle ball.

I left feeling like I had really worked out. And the funny thing was that we had done less than what I would have done on my own, just more efficiently.





Do you know what your strengths are?
Are you using your "strength" as efficiently as you can?

Hexed

Some days all the noise hexes me. The tweeting, the Facebook posts, the YouTube videos. All that self promotion that is at once a benefit to leveling the playing field in this new interconnected on line world we live in and an annoyance. What is real and what is made up?

Some days I get hexed. I start comparing myself to what others are doing.
How did she get that book deal?
How come his blog got picked up by the Huffington Post and mine didn't?
Does everyone really need to voice their opinion about everything?
Isn't tweeting that you actually managed to find ten minutes to meditate a contradiction of statement?
Or do you just think it's cool to tell people you meditate even though you clearly don't fully understand what that means?

Some days even when I shut all the noise off I can still hear it in my brain as if my internal computer pressed the repeat button and it got stuck.

Some days I get hexed, thrown off my own course by the spell all this constant chatter has created.

I am frozen in my tracks. I get no work done. I feel helpless in how I will be heard about the noise. Does it mean I have to start saying stupid things and making sure they go viral? I hope not, because in that case I will never be heard.  Not that I promise to never say anything I might regret, but it is not my style to spew falsity and to speak just for the sake of hearing my own voice.

Some days I get hexed and  my only recourse is to take a tip from Thoreau and create my own little version of the woods he went to live in. Except instead of Walden Pond I bundle up and head for the Reservoir. Cell phone off. No iPod buds in my ear. No texting. No tweeting. Just me, the quiet and the oasis that is Central Park.


Do you get hexed by all the "noise" out there?
Do you think there is too much "noise"?
How do you differentiate between what is real and what is made up?
Do you think you have to say "stupid" to be heard?

Choosing Happy

"I discovered I always have choices and sometimes it's only a choice of attitude." 

Judith M. Knowlton via Gloria Feldt

I received an email this morning from an old friend.  He remarked that I seemed to be doing quite well and reflected a happy person's views in this "sea of negativity." I remember him from the decades ago we were in each other's daily lives as one of those "happy people." He had a vibrant energy with an easy laugh and a why not attitude.  He was fun to be around. Which accounts for the large circle of people that were drawn to be in his presence.

People like him always made me want some of whatever they had going on.  You see back when I knew my friend I was not one of those happy people.  I can see that look you're giving me now. How could that be possible?  It's the same one I get when I tell people I once had weight issues. But it's true.

I  wasn't that happy even though I got pretty good at pretending. As the child of depression era parents I grew up with a "make the best with what you have" attitude. Which meant I got very good at rationalization. Yes on the surface it all looked pretty shiny. But inside it  didn't always feel right.

This was long before I understood energy, personal truth and the power of something as simple as breathing. So my core felt like a giant log jam that I couldn't find my way out of.

Back then I didn't understand I could choose happiness.  I didn't understand the fine line of  difference between gratitude for what is and trying to make the best of a situation I didn't want. I didn't get that gratitude is simply an acknowledgment of the good that has already shown up in one's life. And unlike making the best of something which for me was twisted with the fear  I was stuck with whatever that was forever, gratitude for what is allows you dream of what will be. And to believe it is possible. It's very simply a step towards it.

A mind shift if you may. A choice.

In this "sea of negativity" perpetuated by media voices more concerned with complaining than doing, with doom than hope, one of the simplest thing we have control over is how we choose to be. We can be happy or not. We can believe in positive change or stagnation. We can smile or we can frown. We can look for the good or the bad. We can believe we can control our thoughts and our attitude or we can believe we are victims.

What do you choose?




Note: In gratitude for my dear friend's note  and for Gloria Feldt's perfectly timed tweet which both arrived this morning and without which I have no idea what I would have blogged about !