5 Things You Should Know Before You Write Those New Year's Resolutions

I love a clean sheet of paper. I love to make lists. I love to commit to writing what I want to change up in my life. I think it is a great and necessary first step to making it happen. So you would think I would be a big fan of New Year’s Resolutions. But I’m not.

I have my reasons.  For starters, I don’t like the word.  Which is why my list is labeled Intentions. I also don’t think it needs to be the New Year to experiment with change. I think change is necessary to growth and that is a year round activity. But that’s just me. And I tend not to fit into the norm.

Most people will make a list that will be doomed before they finish it. It might even be the same list they wrote last year and the year before that, only now on a fresh sheet of paper. They'll tuck it away someplace safe. Maybe even for a few days they'll act on it. Half way through the year they'll wonder why nothing changed. 

Here's what they needed to know before they started:

1- Don’t call them resolutions!  Resolution is a terrible word. It’s so clinical and unsexy. You’re doomed to failure before you start. Plus, it implies that whatever you were doing before was a big problem that you are now going to re solve. That does not sound like fun, and let’s face it, if there is not a way to have fun with this, why bother? 

2-Experiment with the word intention. Intention has no fixed outcome. You can intend to do something differently. You can intend to create something new. And by intending instead of resolving you allow the Universe to intercede, perhaps delivering up something that is even better than what you originally wrote down. 

3- Remember that true change requires discipline. Yes, discipline. Not a very user-friendly word in our culture. But if it is a 2013 that does not look like 2012 you want, you are going to have to exert some discipline.

For instance, if one of your resolutions/intentions/desires is to expand your business network then put aside at least one hour a week to go and spend on LinkedIn.  Set the timer and don’t get up until  it goes off. And then do it again, next week. 

4-Don’t forget to check your progress. Most of us will forget where we stored the list before Martin Luther King’s Birthday rolls around much less what we wrote on it. If you’re really intent on making some changes in 2013, you need to revisit that list periodically and see how things are going. Set up a schedule of reminders. 

I’ve become a big fan of a program called GoodtoDo that allows me to schedule recurring ToDo’s. This year I will set one so I can check in every month on how I’m doing with my intentions. The beauty of the program is that you don't have to worry about remembering to check in. Through the miracle of technology the program will remind you automatically on the day you told it. 

Let’s face it, in this 24/7 information on overload world we live in, we will all forget, no matter how important or what our age. In fact, it is often the things that we want most to change that we subconsciously push to the back of our mind.

Hold yourself accountable. Or enlist the help of someone or something else. Like GoodtoDo.

5-Read your list out loud. Preferably in the company of a living, breathing witness. Check in with yourself. Can you feel the rightness of your intentions? Are they coming from a true desire you have or what you think you should be doing?  If they make you nauseous, is it the good kind that lets you know you’re on the right track and headed towards something good? Or is it the kind that is a warning signal to you that this isn't really what you want on your list this year?

Now go to it! Make that list. Check in on it every month and let me know how it goes. Happy New Year!

One Day And It All Changed

Twenty-six years ago today I was at home in my apartment in the Art Museum section of Philadelphia vacuuming when the phone rang. It was Carmella, the neighbor who lived four houses away from my parents telling me they had rushed my father to the emergency room.

 "Get home quick. Your mother is going to need you."

I  wanted more information. I wanted to speak to my mother, but she wouldn't get on the phone. I wanted some assurance. I wanted to know that this was just a blip on the road to recovery, a journey that had begun the previous October when my father had a stroke. But I was not getting any such thing.

I called my brother. It was his first Saturday working at the job he had started that Monday.  I told him to meet me at the hospital. I told him I was scared. Really scared. I cried. In those days I didn't cry as easily as I do now. Which must have scared him too.  He told me it was going to be okay. He sounded so calm I almost believed him.

All these years later I still remember that ride up I-95 to Warminster General Hospital. It was a grey, overcast day just like it was this morning.  I kept telling myself it was going to be okay. Whatever had happened they could fix. But as much as I tried to convince myself, always the  optimist, I know when there is no space for that.  I knew that my life was forever changed. I knew before I walked into the small private room where my mother and brother sat waiting for me to arrive. I knew before they could finish that horrible sentence no one ever wants to hear.

"We did everything we could. Your father was a very sick man...."

I screamed. Loudly. Me, the one who never screams.  The one who everyone in the family counts on to stay calm in moments of real crisis. No one was more surprised than me.

The doctor suggested I calm down, that perhaps I might need something to help.  I shouted that I didn't need any medication.

"My father just died! Why shouldn't I be screaming?"

I was the one who asked to see him. I wanted proof.  My life had changed in the space of a moment. I needed that proof.

The memories of the rest of that day and the days that followed are not as clear. Except for that awareness that everything looked and felt different to me. His energy, his big, rousing and captivating energy had left this plane and moved on to another.

My mother was right when she told me that no matter how sad I felt then,  how much one event  had changed everything, life would go on and I with it.

That doesn't mean there is a day that goes by when I have not thought about him at least once. Something happens and I am reminded of his smile, his laugh, his pervasive energy that lit up a room like few people I have ever met. And then of course those moments when I feel his presence next to me, protecting me, sometimes nudging me forward.

I hadn't planned on writing this blog today, but it felt necessary. This anniversary I am missing him more than usual. For no logical reason. Except he was my father. And I was his little girl.

The last full family photo, taken exactly one week before Dad passed at my cousin's wedding.

No Where To Hide

I've been here before. At that point in a project where I want to run from it. Burn every last page I have written to assure that any trace it ever existed vanishes. Fire I find, is more satisfying that simply hitting the move to trash prompt. Fire does not allow me the leeway to reconsider and drag it back out of the trash and onto my desktop.

That is where I have been this week as I struggle for satisfaction with the last few pages of this part guide, part manifesto on how to create more time for your life. I've tried to trick myself by pretending that rather than a full length book, this is like writing a very long blog. My hope being that I would  see less pressure to getting it perfect. I found myself filled with all those demons that when I started this I had forgotten existed. Who am I to write about this subject? Why do I think anyone will care?

As I said, I've been here before so I know better than to listen to those little fiends. Instead I kept taking the steps to assure I keep moving forward. I spoke to my cover designer. I emailed my interior designer. I reached out to the copyeditors. I set deadlines for myself. And then when I knew I needed outside inspiration, I literally took a page from my own book and stopped. I set the timer for sixty minutes and opened my Kindle App. And I read.

The Universe apparently was winning the war with my demons because it led me to open Poke the Box, a manifesto by Seth Godin about starting.

You may wonder how a manifesto about starting could help someone who was trying to finish. You'll have to read it yourself to completely understand but I assure you it did.

Most of us think we have nothing of importance to say or that raising our hand and standing up for something, however big or small it is, will not make a difference. And therein lies the problems in our world.

Seth wrote, "We're trained to fit in, not to stand out, and the easiest way in the world to fit in is to never initiate."

That's when I got it. The demons that have been fighting for air time in my head are the ones who want me to fit in, to hide, and to accept the status quo. And the struggle for those last pages, which as it turns out are the first pages, have been the demons trying to get me to quiet my voice and keep me still.

Guess whose winning now?

The Toll Booth On The Information Highway

Change will always occur, whether we want it to or not. Sometimes it is for the betterment of the world and other times we question it. We seek it in our lives, for we know without change things can get boring. Change is borne of desire for something different and so is what keeps us alive.

Yet so many of us avoid change. We hold on to what is, convinced the devil we know is better than the devil we don't. Or we worry that the change will affect our little acre of land in this world. So we resist it, holding on tight until our knuckles turn white trying to stop it.

Right now there is legislation in Washington trying to pull the reins in on change. It is funded by those who fear they have the most to lose. Financially. It has been written by those who don't fully understand the infrastructure much less the implications of what they are trying to control. What they do understand is the Internet is basically free. And while we say we are the "land of the free" we prefer to figure out ways to charge everyone for everything.  Ironically, it is one of the few pieces of legislation that has bi-partisan support.

The interesting thing is the same people trying to curtail the change are the ones who dismissed it early on.  They thought things like the Internet and the free exchange of information were a passing fad that would have no effect on their brick and mortar establishments. Turns out they were wrong and now they want to try and stop it. Without really understanding what they are doing.

Should there be rules of the Internet highway? Of course. But don't try to push through ones like SOPA and PIPA whose primary interest is to erect a toll booth on what was a freeway.

I'd like to send you to other websites for more information on what is going on. But according to the pending legislation I may no longer be able to do that. Parts of these laws would curtail bloggers like myself from linking to anything without express permission and in fact possibly shut me down if I linked to something, somewhere that was not in full compliance with the new rules. Their justification? That someone, somewhere is not getting their nickels worth of royalty on possibly copyrighted material. 

So to give you a taste of what that world might be like, I'll leave you to fend for yourselves if you are interested in more details. Turn on the TV. Buy a newspaper. Spend some more money.  Imagine a world without Google.

I've Got A Feeling

This may not be a particularly popular viewpoint or very trendy, but I have a good feeling about 2012. I think it is going to be an exceptional year.

I realize the prevailing thought patterns like to believe otherwise. Our culture seems to prefer to obsess over all that is not right with the world. The media is convinced we respond better to bad news than good. and so inundate us with headlines designed to make us tune in, turn on, and click through by  boasting how bad things are and how much worse they will get. They feed on our obsessions, sometimes forcing us to pay attention to what we don't want to. We have 24/7 News that repeats the same handful of  sad stories while ignoring the multitudes of good  that never get reported.  And because we do watch and listen and read on-line and off-line what they serve up,  we get more of it.

I am as guilty as the next person when it comes to wanting to know the details behind that doomsday promotional tease.  But I find more and more, especially when I follow the story through to the end, it has little substance. Or it gives me no new news or insight. It lacks adequate factual research. Plus it makes me feel bad. And rather helpless.

And I am not helpless, nor are any of us. I have a good feeling about 2012 because I know I can make a difference, I can create my own change in my little corner of the world.  I can have a positive effect on the direction things are going. It doesn't have to be launching a new campaign to end world hunger or writing another book, although it can be. It can also be as simple as behavioral changes.

Like making an effort to say please and thank-you more often. Telling someone you love them on a day that isn't Valentine's Day. Smiling at a stranger.  Saying I'm sorry when you bump me not once, not twice but three times in an aisle at Whole Foods. Not supporting a product or media outlet whose approach you find offensive. Supporting the ones whose direction you like. Voting. Look for the good in the world. Yes, there is  good to be found. Believing you can change the world.

I'm immersed in the Steve Jobs biography at the moment. One of the things Walter Isaacson constantly refer to is what was termed Jobs "reality distortion field." When Steve was looking through that lens people didn't know what to do. They didn't have the ability to see as he did. They saw what they thought was reality which was usually synonymous with "that's impossible". But Jobs saw what he would make his reality or what I like to call the "why not?" option.

So that is how I am going to approach this year. At times you may think I am living in my own "reality distortion field." And I may be. But the only way to change what is, is by seeing what can be and then taking those steps to make the "distortion" real.

Change in your own world will have an effect on the larger world. As long as you believe.



What are you feeling about 2012?
What changes do you want to make?


Ready to make some big changes? Stay tuned for details on what I have up my sleeve to help coach you to change in 2012. And if you are not already signed up to receive my newsletter or blog, do so now!

My First Birthday Published

It was around the time this picture was taken I wrote my first story. It was published in the school paper, The Castlewood Times. It wasn’t very long, a few sentences strung together but I was quite proud of my accomplishment.

The little girl in that picture looked at the world with fresh eyes, wanting to know everything about everything, anxious to discover and bursting at the seams with anticipation. She believed there would come a day when she would know everything there was to know. There would be nothing left to learn. She would be that wise. No one told her that wasn’t going to happen. And even if they had, she wouldn’t have believed them.  

There are times in our lives when we stagnate, as though we have reached the pinnacle my little girl self thought she would attain. Then we try something new, stretch out of our comfort zone and we are in awe of how young and alive we feel again. And though we may look in the mirror and not see our younger self, that aura surrounds our being.

That about sums up how I feel on my first birthday as a published author.

My learning curve has been steeper than steep these last months as I dove head first into the world of self-publishing. Every day has served up something new.

So far I have learned:

• A review or personal note from someone who liked your story, loved your characters and thinks you are a talented writer can set one floating on air for the rest of the day. 
• Readers discover aspects of your storytelling that will surprise you.
• People find it very inspiring when you actually do what you have said you were going to do.
• Some people want you to fail and will continue to point out all the ways success, as an independent author is more difficult than if you were published by a legacy house.
• More people want you to succeed.
• Walking the walk of creating change instead of just talking about it makes me a better coach for my clients.
• I really like being interviewed on the radio!
• Traditional publishing is trying desperately to hold on to its “elitist” attitude. It trickles down to unexpected places like non-corporate blogs that won’t review your book because it is “too hard to vet self-published books.”
• Everyone is quick to point out all the not great indie stuff being put out into the world, but not so quick to point out all the not great traditional stuff sitting next to it.
• People on the “inside” of the traditional world know very little about what is happening in the world of self-publishing. I attended one event where a panelist from inside this bubble announced with 100% certainty that if you published on Kindle you gave them your rights and couldn’t publish anywhere else. (Note: This is SO NOT true.)
• People adore their Kindles but they are still buying print copies too.
• Having a sales and marketing background makes this much easier to navigate.
• Staring at my revenue data trying to wish a higher number reminds me of my ad sales day. (Note: this practice does not sell more books)
• Amazon and Barnes and Noble reviews, Tweets, Facebook recommendations, PR pitches, and connections do.
• That just about everyone says they always wanted to write a book and want to know how I did it. (Hint: First thing is you have to write, every day.)
• That help and support comes from unexpected places.

Do I feel differently, on this, my first birthday officially published?

Yes. Remarkably younger, yet as accomplished as I did that day The Castlewood Times published my story. Maybe even a tad more.

And please, no gifts...okay if you must, then buy a book, or two or three. They make great holiday gifts for your friends and co-workers. Reviews on Amazon and Barnes and Noble are good too, as are Facebook posts and Tweets to your tribe! 

The Secrets They Kept is now available for sale on Amazon, Barnes and Noble, iTunes and other on-line booksellers.

While You Were Out

In case you haven't noticed we're living in a time where things are changing so fast that keeping up can be pretty exhausting. I needed to slow it down the other day and instead of completely shutting it all off,  I did something old fashioned and decided to read my print version of the New York Times instead of the one on my iPad.

I caught a little blurb in the sidebar,  that four new print magazines are launching next week that will advise business owners how to use social media tools. I know it sounds funny, doesn't it?  Starting new print outlets in this age where supposedly that is dying as fast and furious as the trees used to make the paper.  And all with the purpose of teaching ( translate: making money off of)  those companies that haven't been paying attention the last three years how to use use platforms like Twitter, Facebook, Google and LinkedIn to their benefit.  But apparently, it's true.

The owners, GSG World Media have a website with a big headline "social media's about to get down to business" that I am sure will be chock full of all those things that new media marketers have been talking about on their blogs and in teleseminars for free the last few years while those companies were out doing something else, diverting their attention to things like downsizing their organizations and I am sure hoping this social media thing was just a passing fad.

That's  what happens when real change abounds. The majority of us tune it out, hope it goes away and long for the good ol'days when you didn't worry so much when you left your office about all the "stuff" you would come back to. A time when things like phone messages were written on a pink slip of paper by a human being and email was barely a glimmer in someone's eye.

But sometimes the noise gets too loud and we are forced to pay attention. Sometimes that leaves us behind the eight ball or in this case with the option of paying $7.95 a publication at your local Office Depot.

I am the first to tell you social media will not replace and make extinct all other forms of media, just like FM radio in the eighties did not make AM stations go away nor did cable make people stop watching broadcast. The pie just became more fragmented. Instead of indulging on one big wedge of apple crumb, you can have a sliver and still have room to try the blueberry and the pecan if that is your taste, never changing your caloric intake. Or like me, you can embrace the change, mix up scrolling on your iPad with some good old fashioned newsprint on your fingers  while you search the sidebars for interesting tidbits with which to write a blog.



How do you react to change?
Do you wait until you have to adapt or are you an early embracer?


BTW...Have I mentioned my debut novel, The Secrets They Kept is now available on Amazon AND Barnes and Noble in print and e-book! And please, feel free to use your social media of choice to help spread the word and the book sales! 

Ready Or Not

Yesterday morning it was summer. Hot, humid, air-conditioning weather. By late afternoon, it was fall. Temperatures dropped severely on the island I call Manhattan and a jacket was needed.

I thought I was ready for fall until I found myself shivering on a street corner last night while thinking gloves and a scarf might have been a good idea. Suddenly I wanted to push the stop button, plead, no, not yet, just a few more weeks of warm weather, please. At least a few more days.

But that isn't how it works. Once things change, there is no going back. Yes, there will be another summer, but it won't look like, taste like, feel like this one. Now we move forward, writing the chapter called fall.

We live so much of our lives looking for things to change, wanting them to change, trying to make them change, waiting for them to change. And then when the change happens it's a big Uh Oh! Did I really think I was ready for this? I'm not so sure!

In the space of a week I will be pushing a series of buttons and my novel will be for sale. Just like that it will go from a work in progress to a work completed.  I will go from a writer to a published author. Whether I am ready or not,  I will be standing in a brand new place and just like this summer, there is no going back.

The Secrets They Kept will be available soon on Amazon.com, BarnesandNoble.com, iBookstore, and other select on line booksellers.

What I Know For Sure

Dear Oprah,

What I know for sure is that I cringe at  endings. As much as I like change, look forward to what's next and love the start of anything new, especially a good book, I get twisted up when something ends. And that is how I feel now.

I don't like that my DVR will not be clicking in at 4PM every day just to make sure I didn't miss a really good show. I don't like that a reasonable voice in a sea of media insanity will be harder to come by. I don't like that I haven't published my novel in time to get you to pick it for your book club. I don't like that you are choosing this particular time, when the world is in such turmoil and so much is shifting and changing to give us one more upset.

But I do understand what it means to get to that point in a long and good run when you know you have to end it. That it is the only way to make room for something new.

I started this blog when I made a choice to leave my corporate career after, yes, 25 years, that magic number, because my core spoke to me and told me there was no other choice, not if I wanted to keep growing. It was time.

What I know for sure is how it feels that first Monday after the last day when you get up and make the coffee and realize you don't have to go where you used to go. When all of those familiarities of daily life are missing until you create a new set.  I have lived with the challenge of taking on something brand new, listening to people question your decision, and live with nothing more than trust and faith that it will all work out, it always does.

A lot of people say they grew up watching you. I like to say we aged together. I was born at the other end of the same year you were. While in so many respects our upbringing was vastly different, we were both raised in a world of Leave it to Beaver and Father Knows Best in which women were portrayed as changing light bulbs in their high heels. And because of that I marvel even more at what you have accomplished.

What I know for sure is your influence knows no bounds. In a day of sensationalist interviewing, you maintained professionalism and class, allowing your viewers to reach their own conclusions without feeling they had been arm wrestled. And for that you won clout and our respect.

My favorite quote was in the NY Times on Thursday when they said "Ms.Winfrey blends the mystical and the practical better than anyone else in show business."

It is the mystical that is the divine feminine and the practical that is the male and only in balance will the world be healed.  You've helped to set that healing in motion. For that I thank you.

Less than three weeks after you launched in 1986 my father died. I couldn't imagine the world would go on without him.  But it did and so will ours without  Oprah at 4.

As for you Oprah, what I know for sure is that you will build OWN to be worthy of your name. I also know change is not without its bumps no matter how much you sought it. So feel free to stop by my blog and peruse some of the early entries. I'm told they can be helpful :)

Your fan, 

Joanne

The Walgreening of Duane Reade

Anyone who has ever traveled to South Beach with me knows of my fascination with the Walgreen's on Lincoln Road. No matter what hotel I am staying at I feel the need to stop in Walgreen's at least once if not twice a day. Sometimes it is with purpose and sometimes just to wander the aisles for a few minutes before calling it a night. I am fascinated not only with the diverse clientele, but with the array of items you can purchase, beach hats, cookies, bananas  and flip flops, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.

OK, so maybe it sounds a little crazy, but I've always considered that particular Walgreen's to be part of the tourist attraction of Ocean Drive.

Anyway given my thing for Walgreen's on Lincoln Road, you would think I would be happy they now own Duane Reade. You would think I would be happier still that they are in the process of renovating my most visited Duane Reade to resemble Walgreen's. But I'm not.

At first I thought it was because every time I've walked in there in the last few weeks they have rearranged the furniture. Trust me.  I am not exaggerating. No one seems to be able to make up their mind where everything is going.

I thought  I was just annoyed  because finding a box of Kleenex became a scavenger  hunt that even the workers had trouble solving for me.

But now I know it's something different. It may still (very smartly I might add) say Duane Reade outside, but it's not anymore. Maybe it's a little too clean, a little too bright. Maybe it's a little too organized. Or maybe it just looks a little too suburban Midwest to be sitting on Broadway.

It doesn't even resemble my favorite one on Lincoln Road. And even if it did, I don't want to be able to buy a pair of cheap earrings in Duane Reade much less a pair of socks. This is Manhattan. You don't  go to Duane Reade to buy earrings or socks when you live in New York!  It's a drugstore. Or it was. But then that's what Walgreen's started out as too.

I understand the brand new one on 72nd and Broadway above Trader Joe's now sells beer.  You would think there would be a law against selling prescription drugs and beer under the same roof. They must get around it by requiring you bring your own growler for the beer.  My guess is if you've forgotten yours they can be found sold  separately somewhere else in the store. Maybe near the Kleenex so you can have them handy if after a few sips of beer you decide to start crying over all this change.

I know you're reading this and thinking, isn't this the woman who likes change, whose coaching practice specializes in change?  Is this her complaining about a change? The answer is yes, but I am also  a New Yorker, and as much as we like change, we are creatures of habit in other areas, especially when it comes to our neighborhood conveniences.

Now if in the process of Walgreening the Duane Reade they want to bring some change no one will complain about, they might want to start with the price of a roll of toilet paper. I checked yesterday and that was still at the Duane Reade price of $1.49 a roll.

The Myth of the Handcuffs: A Story

"What else am I going to do?" 

There was a time you never asked that question. But that was before, when things were different. It was another century when you thought they cared about you and about what you might contribute to the organization. When you believed. Before it became clear that it was only about the money, how much and how fast it could hit the ledger. .


"What choice do I have, do any of us have?" 
You try to move your hands but they are locked behind your back. You shift your body. The handcuffs hurt today, more than most days.  It seems the more you twist the deeper they dig into your wrists.

"There is no other choice."
Everyone around you agrees. There is no other option. Not for any of them.

"Besides, how can you possibly leave all this?"
There is too much at stake. Money. Benefits. Retirement.


"At least we're all in this together."
Those handcuffs are not yours alone. Everyone else seems to have a pair pressing against their wrists. They come in a variety of colors, some tighter and larger than others. But you're all locked together, each at your respective desks, all convinced you have no other options. You laugh and make jokes and rationalize that this is just the way things are.  Because really, what is the other option? You can't really get out, can you?

"But there must be a way."
In the back of your mind you are sure there has to be a key around here someplace. But where? And who holds it?

"They've got the key. They've got the power."
You hear that so much you start to believe it. You are just a cog in the wheel. "They" are the only ones who can change this. But that can't be right. Can it? This is America.

"There has to be something else I can do !"
You're getting stiff in this chair. You start to struggle. You're trying to get the feeling back in your hands.  You look around for the damn key. You wiggle your fingers.  You feel a button. You press your thumb against it. You push and the cuff on your right hand releases. There wasn't a key after all!  You weren't locked in. Not really. Your wrists are sore and the cuffs have made a mark. But you've escaped!

"But what are you going to do now?"
The voice in the chair next to you, their arms still stretched around the chair's back, not moving, sounds worried.

"I'm not exactly sure. But I've been thinking alot. I have some ideas."
An energy floods your body that you have not felt in such a long time. Excitement. Anticipation. Possibility.

"Ideas? But isn't this safer?"


"Maybe. I guess it's how you define safe."


Your workmates looks confused. They have never seen this side of you before.

"You know, you're not really locked in either. I can show you where the release button is."


"No, no. Mine are different. There is no way out for me." 
Their heads shake, convinced they are right and you are wrong.


You understand. You wanted to believe that too, for a long time. It was easier that way.






Are you handcuffed to your job?
Do you believe you have options?
Is it scarier for you to stay or to try something new?

Things They Are A Changing

While many like to argue that things aren't changing fast enough there are those who think things are changing too much and pushing hard and loud against it. I'm not talking politics today, although this certainly holds true for that as well, but the way we do business.

As the economy struggles to rebuild, the old rules don't necessarily apply, although many will tell you just the opposite, hanging on to my most favorite of laments,"But this is always the way we've done things." Those who are brave enough to think out of the box are not always supported. In fact they are often chided, told their way will never work and their doom is predicted before they go up to bat, especially by those who find it safer to hold on to the old ways.

But the fact is that change is a happening. Just because things have always been done a certain way does not mean it's still going to work. And just because someone or some new business enterprise decides to defy the laws of convention does not mean they are doomed. In fact it might be just the opposite.

Case in point is an interesting article by David Carr in The New York Times on The Awl. The Awl calls themselves a "web based" concern with the intention of encouraging "a daily discussion of the issues of the day."  They focus on the stuff everyone else doesn't pay much attention to but is still interesting and newsworthy.

The Awl did not skyrocket to over night success.  But two years later things are turning a corner. I  invite you to read the article in entirety for the details and to visit their site. But my point is they went against convention and it worked.

We live in a world of over analyzing, with too many claiming to be experts.  Too many more saying this is the way, the only way and if you don't follow that way, you're wrong, not to mention doomed to fail. We look for the problems instead of the solutions. We fail to pay enough attention to our instincts.

But things are a changing. Morphing. Evolving. It's one of those times in history where we can take the best of what we know and have learned and apply it in new and innovative ways.

I like what the founders of The Awl did. They created something based on what they knew their circle of friends would read. There were no high priced focus groups or infamous polling. No five year business plan.

They went with what I am sure was their instincts whether they realized it at the time or not.  They created a viable business doing what they like best. They could have failed and perhaps at another point in time they would have.  But not now.  'Cause things, they are a changing.

Maybe they were lucky. But as a boss I had early in my career used to say, there is no  luck. If you are in the right place at the right time,  doing what you are supposed to be doing you have created your own luck. These days that might mean going against convention.


Do you justify what you do by saying this is the way we've always done it?
Or do you defy convention?

The Way

When I first started working at CBS in the late eighties I was introduced to The Way.  The Way referred to how we did business. Adapting to the way and understanding the way was in direction proportion to the way you fared in the company.

I welcomed the way.  The company I worked at previously was at the time a fledgling broadcaster. There was no way there. You made up the way as you went along.

The idea of a having a distinct set of rules and parameters seemed refreshing to me. I didn't question the way, at least not immediately. After all CBS had a history of success. Whatever the way was it must be the right way. Sounds rather naive now, doesn't it?

When we 'merged' with Westinghouse in the early nineties I saw for the first time what happens when two different ways join. It didn't take long before it was clear that the Westinghouse way was the new direction. There was nothing particularly new or innovative about their way. It was just a different way. Some things would prove beneficial  and others, like the brief period they decided to list the new company as Westinghouse, only to discover it did not help the stock price because people thought of Westinghouse as light bulb manufacturers and not broadcasters, would prove short lived.

But it was also the first time I started to hear the choruses of but that is not the way we do things and but we've always done it like this among my colleagues, myself included.  Change was coming and it didn't feel as exciting and wonderful as it was being spun.

I thought about that time today when I was reading about  Lewis D'Vorkin's new editorial model for the Forbes website in Advertising Age.  I'm still not clear on how innovative it actually is. From my advertising and writing background it seems to be putting the television concept of paid advertorials on line in the form of advertiser provided blogs. The controversial part, as it always has been in television, is how to make clear the distinction between what is unbiased news and what is advertising.

In any case I can hear the internal chorus of that is not they way things are done here all the way uptown. Change is uncomfortable. Change is questioned. Change is resisted.  Change is scary.

And we never really know for sure as change is occurring that it is the right way to go. Sometimes we fall flat on our faces. But shaking up the way things have been done is a necessary part of our culture at this moment in time. So we try.

What I learned from those naive CBS days is that sometimes having a way is good and sometimes being able to make it up as you go is even better. But doing something just because that is the way we've always done it is never good. And in today's ever changing world serves no one, least of all ourselves.


What are you doing today just because it's "the way" you always have?
What one thing can you try that will be different?

The Rain Of Change

It feels strange. Rain. Two days in a row. What feels more bizarre is that I like it.

Don't get me wrong. I don't dislike rain. I enjoy a good downpour every now and then, especially when the apartment is clean, the refrigerator is full of food and I have no place I have to be except at my iMac writing. But usually one day is enough and that one day was yesterday.

Rain can depress me. It can make me lazy and want to do nothing more than snuggle under the covers and watch a good movie. But this rain is doing neither. I was glad to see the overcast skies when I woke up.  I feel happy. And inspired to accomplish a lot of work today.

So I am thinking..what's up with that?


Is it because I can open the windows and feel a cool breeze  circulating without the AC?
Is it the fact that the city always looks a little cleaner and fresher, after a good downpour?
Is it because there has been so little this summer that it feels like an old friend I haven't seen for a while?

Or is it because it doesn't feel like summer rain? It feels like the fall. Could it be....and I hesitate to write this, because I know I will be reminded in the dead of winter when I am longing for warm summer days that I even suggested such a thing....., that I am ready for a change?

I can hear the workman outside setting up the stages for Fashion Week. That and the US Open Tennis signal the end of summer and Back to School in New York City. The season is about to switch.

And as much as a summer girl I am at heart, I am ready.  For new. For fresh. For possibility.

Too much sun and heat invites dry grass and the possibility of brush fire. Too much rain clogs drains, floods homes and blocks roadways. When things stay the same all the time it invites stagnation.

Change is good. Even when it means the summer is almost over.



What does rain do to you?
What is your signpost for the change of seasons?
Are you ready for a change?
What changes are you making?


If your change involves your work check out my coaching services page.