Wednesday, March 4, 2009

Guilt and Bathrobes

I am not sure exactly when it will be, if ever, that I stop feeling guilty when I find myself still in my bathrobe at 10AM on a Wednesday. The guilt is unfounded. It is not as though I have not gotten anything done. I have already managed to write four pages in Seduced by Corporate America. That by any writer’s standard is already an accomplished day.

Yet, I still feel a bit guilty.

So ingrained am I in that office mentality, that you must get up in the dark, shower, dress and be out the door by a quarter to eight in order to work, that I still, now eight months into this, feel guilty.

I know I am not alone sitting in my bathrobe. I know this morning work attire is not limited to writers, but to all my entrepreneur friends who keep home offices. Some sit in their pajamas. Some in their sweats. Some (and sometimes this is me) sit in their gym clothes after a morning run.

I love being able to get up and get right to work. I often wake up with that new idea for where to go next in my story line. Or a new idea for a blog. And I love that I can turn on my computer and get those words out while they are still fresh in my mind, instead of just jotting down a note for later. I love there is not the delay of having to shower and put on make up first before I can work. There are no coworkers distracting me from diving right in. There are no fires that someone else started that I am now responsible to put out.

There is just me, my computer and the page to be filled. And of course, my guilt.

But perhaps the guilt is not from being in my bathrobe writing? Perhaps it is simply because I am happy doing it. That despite all the craziness and uncertainty out there at this very moment, all the 24/7 news sources telling me how miserable I should be, I am happy. I am doing what I want. I am writing. I am creating what is next for me. In my bathrobe.
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